On Endurance in Engagement & Wedding Planning
Starting today and running through October 30th, She’s in the City is hosting a series called More Precious Than Gold – because all of us are just that! The series will encourage women of all ages on endurance in various seasons of depletion and disappointment and was inspired from the following passage in 1 Peter:
“In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith – more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire – may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”
-1 Peter 1:6-7
Each week’s episode will focus on a different season of trial or weariness we face as women. Which begs the question: what if this week’s season doesn’t apply to me? My encouragement is LISTEN ANYWAY! If you haven’t yet experienced something, it’s likely a loved one or dear SHE around you has. We hope in those cases, our talks in the coming weeks can foster compassion in you and serve as a comfort to share with those in your life who are facing these specific seasons.
My new favorite motto, which is noted in this week’s episode, is this:
“We’d rather be with you in your mess than alone in ours.”
I hope y’all feel the same!
This week on More Precious Than Gold, we talk with my sister, Ali, who is currently engaged, and my best friend, Emily, who is a wedding planner by trade. We’re here this week for a long awaited fun topic of enduring in seasons of engagement and wedding planning!
We know that even though planning a wedding is one of the most joyful seasons we experience, it can also be one of great stress. The girls get real about feeling overwhelmed and how to manage expectations: yours, your fiancé’s, and other people’s.
Emily advises us on the daunting question: what are the first steps after the yes? Everything from venue, to dates, to vendors, to guest lists.
Ali talks honestly about the all too common “shock-factor” that can strike after getting engaged and the normalcy and importance of taking time to let it all sink in. There’s no shame in that!
They encourage us in how to manage our decisions and not let the decisions manage us. The bottom line is, enjoy this sweet, sweet time! It’s so special; it’s unlike any other in dating or in marriage; and you’ll never get it back. We pray this helps brides enjoy the anticipation of the wedding, without feeling overcome by the anxiety around the plans. We address the importance of prioritizing, delegating, and owning your Top 8. Stand firm on the elements that mean most to you and your fiancé and have grace with others on the things that aren’t priorities for you.
And finally, we encourage you –be sure the day is reflective of you two as a couple, however that plays itself out, whether in the large or small details.
Most importantly we address the truth of what engagement is intended to do – set the footing to build a marriage. Lean into learning better communication and compromise and find balance as you make decisions together and present a united front to others as a couple.
At the end of the day, the whole season of engagement should sing of joyful anticipation, not tick like a stressful time clock. I love what Ali reminded us as she approaches her wedding date next spring:
“Don’t [stress] what’s coming. Focus on giving your all in the moment. Don’t worry about pacing yourself. [God} will pace you.”